Where Is God?

A couple had two little mischievous boys, ages 8 and 10. They were always getting into trouble, and their parents knew that if any mischief occurred in their town, their sons would get the blame.

The boys' mother heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys.

The clergyman agreed and asked to see them individually.

So, the mother sent her 8-year-old first, in the morning, with the older boy to see the clergyman in the afternoon.

The clergyman, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly, "Where is God?"

The boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there with his mouth hanging open.

The clergyman repeated the question. "Where is God?"

Again, the boy made no attempt to answer.

So, the clergyman raised his voice some more and shook his finger in the boy's face and bellowed, "Where is God!?"

The boy screamed and bolted from the room. He ran directly home and dove into his closet, slamming the door behind him.

When his older brother found him in the closet, he asked, "What happened?"

The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied: "We are in real BIG trouble this time! God is missing, and they think we did it!"

Son's Proud Daddy

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party. After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room.

Those who remained talked about their kids.

The first guy said, "My son is my pride and joy. He started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he's the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday."

The second guy said, "Darn, that's terrific!? My son is also my pride and joy. He started working for a big airline, then went to flight school to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company, where he owns the majority of its assets. He's so rich that he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his birthday."

The third man said: "Well, that's terrific! My son studied in the best universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion."

The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned from the restroom and asked: "What are all the congratulations for?"

One of the three said: "We were talking about the pride we feel for the successes of our sons, What about your son?"

The fourth man replied: "My son is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub."

The three friends said: "What a shame!!! What a disappointment!!!"

The fourth man replied: "No, I'm not ashamed. He's my son and I love him. And he hasn't done too bad either. His birthday was two weeks ago, and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his three boyfriends"

Can You Do This?

This is so funny that it will boggle your mind. And you will keep trying it at least 50 more times to see if you can outsmart your foot. But you can't!

1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles with it.

2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand. Your foot will change direction!!!

I told you so.. And there is nothing you can do about it!

Train Ticket

Three women and three men were traveling by train to the Super Bowl. At the station, the 3 men each bought a ticket and watched as the three women bought just one ticket.

"How are the three of you going to travel on only one ticket?" asked one of the men.

"Watch and learn," answered one of the women. They all boarded the train. The 3 men took their respective seats but all 3 women crammed into a toilet together and closed the door. Shortly after the train had departed, the conductor came around collecting tickets. He knocked on the toilet door and said, "Ticket, please." The door opened just a crack, and a single arm emerged with a ticket in hand. The conductor took it and moved on.

The men saw this happen and agreed it was quite a clever idea; so, after the game, they decided to do the same thing on the return trip and save some money.

When they got to the station they bought a single ticket for the return trip but saw, to their astonishment, that the 3 women didn't buy any ticket at all!!

"How are you going to travel without a ticket?" said one perplexed man.

"Watch and learn," answered one of the women.

When they boarded the train, the 3 men crammed themselves into a toilet, and the 3 women crammed into another toilet just down the way. Shortly after the train was on its way, one of the women left the toilet and walked over to the toilet in which the men were hiding.

The woman knocked on their door and said,

"Ticket, please."